Friday, December 2, 2011

Dog Days of Denim

Maybe we need to start from a different baseline

So yesterday I went through the joy of shopping for new jeans. I find jean shopping to be second only to bathing suit shopping in the humiliation department. I spent the last week fighting my husband's suggestions to go get "some jeans that fit." Finally, I caved realizing that at least I'd get some new jeans out of the horror show. Although he doesn't seem to care about any other items of clothing, Mr. Schneed is compelled by a greater force to comment on every single pair of dungarees* I own.

It all started a few months ago with some confusion on the part of my body and my wardrobe as to what fits post-baby. While my pre-baby clothing is in theory the same size as before, in reality much of it has been stretched out due to my refusal to wear maternity gear for much of the pregnancy. So...those pre-pregnancy jeans now look both tight and saggy at the same time. Sexy!

Although I've been buying new jeans every few months since having Mr. Monk, I've also been losing weight slowly but steadily. Other than boyfriend jeans, which those of us with hips can't rock without looking like a dock worker, most jeans look better fitted. Therefore, most of my jeans look a little not good.

One of the friends I saw in NYC who has a four month old baby asked me when she's likely to get back to her old body. As I was saying that it takes a (looong) while, she turned to me and wondered aloud if I was at my old self yet. Well, clearly I must not look it! Apparently, everything on the body does not just go back to the way it was before. Even if you're at the same weight or lower, things settle and hang and jiggle differently. Fun times. But, I birthed a baby, and I'll be proud of my body no matter what. (And I'll keep reminding myself of this on the beach next month).

As for the jeans, unfortunately, there is only so much they can do for the shape, length and size of the legs, hips and butt they contain. Too bad there's no store that sells some newer, firmer models.

*My mom cannot call them jeans. Once dungarees, always dungarees.


  1. oh man i tortured myself at old navy today, trying on jeans. somehow, if jeans fit me in the waist, they are baggy in the butt. not cute. so i had to get jeans that were tighter in the waist than i would prefer just so that i don't have saggy butt syndrome. you're definitely right, you can weigh the same as before you had a kid, but your shape changes.

  2. You wouldn't think that with all the brands, cuts and styles, it would be so damn difficult...and yet.

  3. Ugh, Melissa, saggy butts in jeans are the worst! Give me a tight waist any day. I hope you're loving your new look.

    SK-Glad to be of service.

    Seriously, Dawn...and yet.

  4. I hate hat shopping for jeans it drives me friggin crazy..I am tall 5'9 and there never long enough with the shoes I tend to wear when I go out. So I have to be long which drag on the floor and get them altered in order for the perfect fit which is so ridic. I found some really good jeans at old navy if you into the jegging - the Rock Star jegging kinda rocks.....fits perfect