Showing posts with label animals. Show all posts
Showing posts with label animals. Show all posts

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Albeit with more hair


Recently I was chatting with a friend who just adopted a dog. As we were discussing what's awesome and what's awful about puppyhood, I realized that raising a dog is perfect training for raising a wild baby. To wit:

You clean up their shit constantly--especially in the beginning. Now at least the dog poops outside. Tony was far easier to house train then I imagine our crazy little monkey will be. Maybe I should have done elimination communication (this one mama had her 6-month-old poop into a tupperware bin in the middle of a yoga class!)

Everything goes in the mouth--and they always want what you're eating. My husband made the mistake years ago of enticing Tony to eat his food by giving him a little "topper." So now he won't eat his boring old dog food without some chicken, cheese, bacon, cocaine on top. Mr. Monk is showing the same snobbery towards his baby food. "Puree again? Only with caviar!"

Slobbery wet kisses--unfortunately, neither the dog nor the baby can give a kiss without tongue.

You're so excited when they learn a new trick--the fact that Tony pretty much only knows how to "shake" doesn't bode well for Mr. Monk's college applications.

Food motivated--I treat Mr. Monk's puffs as if they are the juiciest bone ever. Sometimes I'll even throw some in the snack trap so it's like a kong and he's got to work them out. Puffs = food + entertainment.

Brain development--my dog at least knows not to play with knives or dive headfirst off the changing table. Though neither speak much, both are very effective at getting their demands across through barks of varying pitch, duration and volume.

Exercise--they both need to be tired out before they'll nap. Mr. Monk spends much of his day crawling back and forth across the house. And back and forth. Exactly like Tony at the dog park. Sometimes I'll even throw a ball for him to "fetch."

I'm beginning to think that Mr. Monk identifies a little too closely with Tony. His new favorite activity is to race over to the dog food, pull himself up and take the food and sprinkle it out all over the floor. Let's not forget splashing his hands in the water bowl-that's THE BEST! And, just this morning, he figured out how to follow Tony outside...right through the doggie door!

"What?"

Friday, May 27, 2011

Ten things that would bother me at home, but somehow don't on a tropical vacation:

* Being woken up by Mr. Monk at 5:30 am the first morning.

* Being woken up by Mr. Schneed at 5:30 am the next morning.

* Hearing unidentifiable animal sounds outside window while trying to fall asleep.

* Eating my weight in ice cream and shave ice.

* Watching lizards crawl up and down the walls of our bedroom.

* Navigating around a centipede on the shower door handle while trying to get out.

* Cleaning mashed papaya bits out of Mr. Monk's hair.

* Cleaning mashed papaya bits out of my hair.

* Getting caught in at least two rainstorms a day.

* Possessing untameable hair that seems to grow horizontally by the hour.